I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
