he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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