i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
