So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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