am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
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