I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
There's always time for handjobs
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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