I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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