You work out of a Hotel?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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