I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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