let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I don't deserve a penis
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize
