I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
