dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
