you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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