Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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