Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
