yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize
