That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Are my feet made of real feet?
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize