I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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