At least make sure they are 18
Why
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Randomize
