dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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