What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Randomize
