I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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