WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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