i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
