definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize
