it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
