So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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