3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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