Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
