And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I pour the whiskey from now on
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
