Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
only you would photoshop your dick
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
