He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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