I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize