he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I'm too high and old for this...
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize