We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
