Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
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