dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
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