She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
We need to feng shui this bitch.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
