ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
it's great music for shaving your balls
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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