My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
There r osticjed everywhere
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Randomize
