How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
