i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
