i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize