I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
