maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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