When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
