Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
