Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
