Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
