We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize
