Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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