Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
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